I spent years trying to script my way to better conversations — memorizing openers, rehearsing stories, planning my next line while the other person was still talking.
It made me worse, not better. The rehearsing itself was the problem. When you're monitoring yourself, your attention is split, and people can feel it. Not consciously — they just walk away with a vague sense that you weren't really there.
The most "charismatic" people aren't the best talkers. They're the best at being fully present. Their attention is entirely on the person in front of them, and that undivided attention is what people experience as warmth.
In your next conversation, when you notice yourself rehearsing your next line, drop it and get genuinely curious about one thing the person just said. Ask about that. The conversation carries itself, and you come across better by doing less.
Presence is a trainable skill, not a personality trait. It improves embarrassingly fast once you stop practicing lines and start practicing attention.